英文幽默笑话小故事2020-06-28 18:15:46168 ℃
Wherever I drove my old car over 55 miles per hour ,it vibrated terribly, so I decided to sell it.My first customer wanted to buy the car, and I battled with my conscience over whether or notto tell him of the vehicle's problem. Finally I did the right thing. Expecting him to drop the deal, Iwas surprised by his reply. That's okay, he said. I'm buying this car for my daughter. If shecomplains about a vibration, I'll know she's driving too fast.
teacher: walter, why don't you wash your face? i can see what you had for breakfast this morning.
walter: what was it?
walter: wrong. that was yesterday.
A drunk decides to go ice fishing, so he gathers his gear and goes walking around until he finds a big patch of ice. He heads into the center of the ice and begins to saw a hole.
All of a sudden，a loud booming voice comes out of the sky. "You will find no fish under that ice.”
The drunk looks around, but sees no one. He starts sawing again. Once more, the voice speaks，"as I said before, there are no fish under the ice.”
The drunk looks all around, high and low, but can’t see a single soul. He picks up the saw and tries one more time to finish.
Before he can even start cutting, the huge voice interrupts. "I have warned you three times now. There are no fish!”
The drunk is now flustered and somewhat scared，so he asks the voice，"how do you know there are no fish? Are you God trying to warn me?"
"No,” the voice replied. "I am the manager of this hockey rink.”
A teacher said to her class： “Who was the first man?” “George Washington，”a little boyshouted promptly. “How do you make out that George Washington was the firstman?”asked the teacher，smiling indulgently. “Because，”said the little boy，“he was first inwar，first in peace，and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”But at this point a larger boyheld up his hand. “Well，” said the teacher to him，“who do you think was the first man?” “Idon't know what his name was，”said the larger boy，“but I know it wasn't GeorgeWashington，ma’am，because the history book says George Washington married awidow，so，of course，there must have been a man ahead of him.”
有个老师问班上的学生： “谁是第一个男人?” “乔治·华盛顿，”一个小男孩当即叫道。 “你怎么知道乔治·华盛顿是第一个男人呢?”老师问道，宽容地微笑着。 小男孩说：“因为他是战时第一，和时第一，国人心中第一。” 这时一个大点儿的男孩举起手来。 “那么，”老师对他说，“你认为谁是第一个男人呢?” “我不知道他的名字，”大点儿的男孩说，“但我知道不是乔治·华盛顿，老师。因为历史书上说，乔治·华盛顿娶了一个寡妇，所以在他前面肯定还有一个男人。”